SCHADENFREUDE

NICKY:
Ooh, how about...
Straight-A students getting Bs?

GARY COLEMAN:
Exes getting STDs!

NICKY:
Waking doormen from their naps!

GARY COLEMAN:
Watching tourists reading maps!

NICKY:
Football players getting tackled!

GARY COLEMAN:
CEOs getting shackled!

NICKY:
Watching actors never reach

GARY AND NICKY:
The ending of their oscar speech!
Schadenfreude!


SCHADENFREUDE is one of the more popular songs in the musical AVENUE Q.  German in origin, the word defines the relief people feel when bad luck or misfortune clobbers someone ELSE. In one sense, it is natural to feel relief if you are the not the one on the fatal flight. But on the other hand, it is not cool--in fact it's sick and cruel--to take pleasure in another's pain.


Why does schadenfreude give some of us a rush? Well, let's get hypothetical.
Jody is unhappy--he drinks, he smokes and that's about it. He is envious of his colleague Jeff who has a loving family, drives a fancy car, and vacations in Europe twice a year.  


When Jeff is audited by the IRS, Jody lights up like a Christmas tree, delighting in what might be Jeff's demise. And furthermore, Jody makes sure that everyone in the building knows how miserable Jeff is going to be.


So what's really going on here. I think it's clear. Jody needs Jeff's bloody misfortune to sustain himself--he is the leech who survives by sucking the life out of its victim. But the blood he drinks is bad--it doesn't make Jody's life better, it doesn't make him happier, it doesn't lead to any fulfillment.


Most ignore the schadenfreudics of the world. And that is okay if you literally turn away when they gossip about crap that happens to someone else. Let them instantly know that you will give them no heed. But if you just remain silent, they will continue their sad show, hurt people whose lives are none of their business, and ensnare you in their gossipy web. 


So, throw a few questions out: what about that makes you happy? what makes you want to make matters worse? why are you spending your time and my time obsessing about something like that? and why don't you spend quality time lifting someone hurting up--this might make you feel better as well.


Do you know any gossipy schadenfreudics?